5 Signs You're Dating a Control Freak
When dating a new guy, it's easy to gloss over (er, excuse) his less-than-stellar behavior in the hopes that it isn't really that big of a deal. This article draws the line between what's acceptable and what's considered a big red flag. —Glo
By Julie Fishman and Meagan McCrary for YourTango
At first it might have been charming: He orders for you on dates, wards off creepy guys at the bar, wants to protect you. What girl doesn't like being taken care of? But there's a thin line between wanting what's best for you and deciding what's best for you.
Whether he's jealous, chauvinistic or just plain insecure, there's no excuse for controlling behavior. A healthy relationship consists of respect and support — not one person calling the shots. As co-authors of The Little Black Book of Big Red Flags, we've seen it all—and here are five sure signs that you're dating a control freak:
1. He critiques everything you do. Often under the guise of wanting to help you, whether it's to improve an area of your life or to keep you from embarrassing yourself, men who find a way of criticizing your behavior and choices are flexing their control muscle.
2. He tells you what to do with your body. Whether it's monitoring what you eat, convincing you to take pole dancing classes when that's so not you, or preventing you from getting a tattoo, there's a point when his concern for your health and appearance can become obsessive.
3. He puts down your girlfriends. Controlling men have a way of isolating women from their gal pals. It could be that he refuses to accompany you on group outings with your friends or that he demands to know where you are, and who you're with, at all times. One of the tell-tale signs that he's slowly cutting you off from your friends is his readiness to bad-mouth them.
4. He doesn't support your interests outside of him. If a man's insecure and controlling, you can bet he doesn't want you doing anything to improve yourself, unless of course it's for his benefit, too. (And God forbid you realize you're too good for him!)
5. He doesn't trust you. If you can't drive his car, make dinner reservations, or walk your dog without him overseeing your every move, he's officially gone from protective to overbearing. When your man doesn't have confidence in your ability to do even the easiest of tasks, it's a sign that you'll always be a sidekick — never a soul mate.
Don't force it: Relationships work best when both people care for, rather than control, each other.Shutterstock