How to Agree to Disagree
Sometimes couples who fight together, stay together—and they're better for it
- David Lees/Getty Images
A couple that has knockdown, drag-out fights about "potato" vs. "po-tah-to" probably should just call the whole thing off. And there are certainly big arguments that can be deal-breakers (I want to live in the city vs. I want to be a hermit). But there are plenty of disagreements that are OK, even productive to have. Here are eight fundamental arguments my girlfriend and I have where we've agreed to disagree.
1. Problems With Authority
The Fight: Recently, my girlfriend and I were planning a trip together. She kept wanting to do all the research online—reading user comments, asking forums, etc.—and I kept wanting to just buy a damn guidebook. The same thing happens when we're choosing a restaurant: I listen to the newspaper and local magazines; she only believes in the world according to Yelp.
The Fundamental Disagreement: Ultimately, this is about which authority we believe. I trust the published, vetted sources, whereas she trusts real people and popular consensus.
How We Deal: We've both tried to get more comfortable using the other person's methods. And we don't allow any one source—whether it's The New York Times or jasminelovesbacon93—to make or break our plans.
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