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Caroline Rules

How to Get and Maintain Body Confidence

Caroline Manzo puts the real in The Real Housewives of New Jersey, and her fans relate to the reality star's no-nonsense attitude, focus on family and, above all, abundant common sense. Check back at Glo every Monday as Caroline helps solve your most pressing dilemmas.

The Dilemma: Many of us made New Year's resolutions that include eating healthier and, thus, losing weight. However, there is a bigger issue that stems from how our bodies look and how we feel about them, i.e, self-esteem. How can we stay motivated when we aren't feeling so happy with ourselves? Are there some tricks or tips to having body confidence that you can suggest?

Caroline's Ruling: Wow, this is a tough question. I feel like we live in a society that puts entirely too much emphasis on “perfection” being the acceptable body image.

Newsflash! There is no perfection. I'd love to know the percentage of magazine photographs that are airbrushed to hide cellulite, bad skin, bald spots, scars, flab and so on. The reality is that we're all human and have to deal with imperfections in ourselves as part of life.

I can honestly say that I've never looked at myself and wished I were something other than what I am. I'm only 5'1” tall. I need a stepstool to reach the top shelf of the pantry, and I usually can't see if I'm anywhere but in the front row of a parade or event. When buying clothes, everything needs to be altered. Did I ever wish I were taller? Not for a moment.

My voice is deep and I sound like a linebacker sometimes; so what, at least when I speak I'm heard. I've got powder blue eyes that everyone thinks are contacts and a large chest that everyone believes to be implants. Even when you've got something natural going for you, the perception is that you've had work done!

The point is, who cares? Do my eyes make me a better person? Does my lack of height make me incompetent? Absolutely NOT. I am what I am and that's all that I am. So are you. If you feel you want to improve on yourself and your appearance, then by all means do it. But do it for the right reasons: for your health, for your gratification and no one else's.

How do you stay motivated? How do we improve our self-image? By feeling the effects of exercise in your body, your boost in energy level, by watching the inches drop, by knowing that you're moving forward towards achieving a goal that you've set for yourself. It's called the sweet smell of success. It's a very powerful feeling, and it's the best motivation I know of.

Never look at the person next to you and compare yourself to them. You are as individual as a snowflake. Be the best you there is. Accept your flaws, embrace your attributes, and learn to love yourself for being the wonderful individual that you are!

  • From marriage dilemmas to family issues, Caroline's got the answers!

    Photo by Michael T. Greco
Caroline Rules
How to Get and Maintain Body Confidence
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