Game, Set & Cyber-Match
The 6 online dating tips every woman should know
1. Play the Field
“It's important to be in more than one community,” Davis says. “It's like being in more than one social circle.” She suggests joining one mainstream site (say, eHarmony or Match.com) as well as one niche service, such as Cupidtino, which brings Apple-product obsessives together, or the unapologetically elitist Sparkology (the site's men—but not its women!—must have graduated from a “top institution”). “Changing sites from time to time, and then revisiting, is the best strategy,” says Davis. That way, you're always the new girl.
2. Ace Your Profile
“Your user name is going to inspire them to click,” says Davis, who suggests a terminology mash-up (e.g., SportySmile). “Never include your name or even initials.” Keep your About Me section positive and fun, the way you'd ideally come across at a cocktail party. At first, Webb thought that women who used opening lines such as “I'm a fun-loving girl that enjoys…” and “I'm a laid-back girl who wants…” were dumbing down. But such lightweight openers are disarming, approachable. “If someone said to you ‘I'm uncomplicated, generally in a happy mood, and I like to do stuff,' you'd want to hang out with him or her, right?” Webb found that the most successful profiles were purposefully casual, under 500 words, and just detailed enough—specific, but not to the point of alienating someone (“like” HBO dramas, but don't zero in on Game of Thrones). “Desperate women write too much,” she observes. Davis cites psychological studies that say the mind can easily grasp groups of three: “So stick to three interests, three words to describe your ideal match, or three favorite movies.” Webb advises against mentioning your job, using foreign words, or referring to yourself in the third person. And save the sarcasm: “Instead of seeming witty and clever, those women just sounded angry.”
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