11 Reasons You Should Consider Dating a Divorced Man
Find out about the unexpected benefits of coupling up with a previously married guy
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Many daters associate divorced people with excess baggage. While there can be some red flags (like if his relationship ended because he was unfaithful), people who've been through a divorce tend to have a deeper, more realistic perspective on marriage than those haven't. We asked experts—and women who've dated (and even married!) divorcés—to explain the many upsides to seeing a formerly married man.
1. He's aware of his past mistakes and shortcomings. As a marriage unravels, "wives are pretty verbal about what they perceive their husbands did wrong," whether it be too much time at the office or being an awful communicator, says marriage and family therapist Rachel Sussman. That's why, Iris, 62, who met her previously married husband on JDate, sees "being divorced as a strength…if the man has learned about himself and is able to embrace change," she says.
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2. He can communicate—and cooperate. Joining lives can go more smoothly with someone who's done so with someone else. "Divorced men have experience sharing finances, a home and schedules. These can be great perks," says licensed psychotherapist Tina B. Tessina, PhD. They're also more "willing to share their feelings and tackle the tough topics," says relationship expert Lori Bizzoco, founder of CupidsPulse.com. These are all so crucial to a successful union.
3. He's not afraid of commitment. Talking about the future doesn't prompt most divorced guys to run for the hills the way it might lifelong older bachelors. "Men who are divorced enjoy companionship that they were familiar with having been married before," says LaPronda, 43, who's dated both never-married and divorced men. "They don't shy away from a conversation about relationships, marriage, love and intimacy." Adds Bizzoco, "Even though his previous marriage didn't work out, dating shows he's willing to open himself up to love and that he's interested in something serious again."