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Vow of Silence

What You Should Never Say to Your Best Friend

Page: 8 of 9
  • "Your wedding was so tiny!" or "You're so much bigger than I was when I was pregnant!"

    What may seem like a harmless observation to you can actually come across as a cruel comparison. Anna's* friend once said, "It was good you got married first; now I know what I don't want at my wedding!" Anna was floored. Before you say something like that, examine your motives for wanting to do so, suggests Melton. Anna's friend, for example, may have wanted planning advice, and she could have told Anna what she loved about her wedding instead of cutting down her friend's choices. "Try to figure out what exactly your friend's wedding [or pregnancy] triggered in you," says Melton. Are you having second thoughts about some of your wedding choices? Worrying about how much weight you've gained by your second trimester? Once you uncover what's at the root of your observations, you can express your feelings without sounding snarky.

Vow of Silence
What You Should Never Say to Your Best Friend
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