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Oh, No You Didn't

10 things never to say to a single mom

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  • 9. "Let me know if you ever need a sitter."

    Yes, a single mom could use a sitter! However, MommaSaid.net blogger Jen Singer says asking in such a flip way can send the wrong message. "An open-ended offer of babysitting might be misconstrued as 'You obviously can't do it on your own.'" Singer suggests proposing something more specific. "Say, 'I'm free Saturday morning if you want me to watch the kids.' Then it feels like a favor that any mom would offer another, single or not." Or ask to swap babysitting duties—it says you need time off, too, and you consider your single mom friend a peer, not a charity case.

    10. "Are you so scared you'll accidentally get pregnant again?"

    Guess what? Some single moms are single by choice—their pregnancies were planned. "After a single-by-choice mom becomes a mother for the first time, 'scared' isn't the word that comes to mind about the prospect of having another baby," says Mikki Morrissette, founder of ChoiceMoms.org. "The more appropriate question is, 'Would you welcome the chance to have a second?'" As for single moms who got pregnant unexpectedly, they tend to be more serious about birth control. Still, some might want more kids and have the courage to do so alone because they're thriving as single moms.

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Oh, No You Didn't
10 things never to say to a single mom
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