9 resolutions that are doomed to fail
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Resolution Reality Check1 of 10
By Denise Wolfe
January 1—the eternal hangover from last night, the endless vows to change. Our bodies, hearts, minds and schedules are ripe for self-improvement, but time and again New Year's resolutions are abandoned, often before the end of January. The solution? Steer clear of making any over-the-top promises you can't keep. Here's a list of nine setting-yourself-up-for-failure resolutions to avoid.
Lose 15 lbs. by Sunday2 of 10
It's the same weight you've lost and regained so many times before. We're not saying you can't do it, but trying to do it over night (or over a week, or even a month) is setting yourself up for failure. (Experts say that most healthy dieters should expect to drop 1 to 2 pounds a week.) Losing weight—and keeping it off—is something that takes concrete lifestyle changes and plenty of patience.
Fall in love3 of 10
Preferably by Valentine's Day. After all, online dating offers so many choices, just pick one, anyone. Hetero with a heartbeat? Sold! Or not. Sure, you can put yourself out there, which will definitely increase the likelihood of meeting someone, but as the song goes, "You can't hurry love."
No more shoes!4 of 10
If you're such a loyal Amazon customer that, when you want to return a purchase, they say, "No, keep it. We'll still send the right one," then don't even think about going cold turkey on your shopaholic ways. Instead, consider giving yourself a wardrobe allowance that you can actually stick to.
Quit FB stalking5 of 10
Looking at pictures of your ex, and your ex before that, and the one before that is a slippery slope. Are you really prepared to block your former flames (and not un-block them only a few days later), to resist the siren song of all those new albums and status updates? If the answer is yes, then tell us how. (No, really, how? Because we need help.)
Run a Marathon6 of 10
You're not a runner, let alone a worker-outer. In fact, walking quickly across the intersection to beat the yellow light makes you winded. The bottom line is that no matter how pricey those new shoes are, they don't come equipped with wings. Why not lower the bar and start with a 5K instead?
Leave work by 57 of 10
You're finally setting boundaries, drawing the line in the sand, letting your boss know who's boss. After all, we know that no one on their deathbed ever said, "I wish I'd spent more time at work." Unfortunately, though, no one said work is supposed to be fun (or easy) either.
Finally finish...8 of 10
...writing that novel/re-covering those chairs/planting that garden. Whatever the project, you're better off first evaluating whether it's really worth getting done. If not, then consider making a resolution to officially strike it from your to-do list.
File taxes early9 of 10
Because, of course, you're going to put every receipt in its correct envelope at the end of each and every day (and maybe you'll even make the envelopes color-coded, wouldn't that be fun?), so pulling together medical expenses and business deductions for the accountant will be a snap? Riiight.
Run with the bulls10 of 10
Or scuba dive the Great Barrier Reef. Or hike a glacier under the aurora borealis. It doesn't have to be anywhere in particular, as long as it's distant, exotic and expensive. Except that, wait, this is not a wish list. It's a resolution list, as in things you can actually resolve to do. And unfortunately, resolve doesn't buy plane tickets or give you time off from work.
NEXT GALLERY: 9 Ways to Simplify Your Life in 2014